I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
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