So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize