I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
