never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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