How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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