real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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