so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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