You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
