Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Randomize
