Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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