We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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