just survived the first fart of the relationship.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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