Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
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