Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
