yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
