you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Randomize
