I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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