You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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