quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Randomize
