tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
You're a waste of cheezeits
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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