i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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