Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
