I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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