You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
