Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
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