is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
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