return my video game
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
When are your genitals available?
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
