I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Randomize