I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
