I'm really into asian looking animals
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
