i just google imaged poop.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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