i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
