But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Randomize
