A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
