he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Found the puke drawer
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
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