It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Randomize
