My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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