We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
