I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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