Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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