you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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