That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
