they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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