Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
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