He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
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