How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Randomize
