dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
