The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
