I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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