Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Randomize
