you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
kristin has been a bad kristin
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize
