Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Send help, water and tortillas.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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